We’ve discussed before
how one of the most affected parties in a divorce are the children. For many, it’s a time when the only living environment they’ve
ever known is about to become a memory. But is it as damaging to a kid’s
psyche as most make it out to be — one doctor says no.
Writing for the Quartz blog, physician and researcher Danielle Teller
looks at that question through the eyes everyone involved: the parents
who feel guilty about their divorce; the children themselves; and society
at large, which has decided to blame many issues with these children forever
more by chalking it up to them being born before their parents split up.
Teller wrote the book
Sacred Cows about how widely held cultural assumptions and misinformation create unnecessary
heartache for people who are already suffering through a terrible time.
Here she discusses some of the anecdotes that came about before and after
the book being published, like a woman whose child, every time she has
difficulties at school, teachers and support staff jump to the conclusion
that divorce is the culprit. The headmistress of the woman’s daughter’s
school summed up the situation perfectly in a letter she wrote to the family.
“Divorce is a one-time event,” she wrote. “Divorce is
a noun. We should not think of ‘divorced’ as an adjective
to describe families and/or children for their entire lives.”
For more:
It’s time we stop pitying children of divorce (Quartz)
Image via Pixaby.