At the Graves Law Firm, we understand the emotional stress you may be experiencing
as you navigate through a divorce. If you and your spouse have children,
you may be unsure of how to discuss your divorce with them. For a child,
divorce can be confusing, sad and stressful, which is why it is imperative
both parents create a plan for how they will discuss their divorce with
the children. Our Pasadena divorce attorney has created a list what to
consider when discussing divorce with your children.
Reassure Your Child Nothing is Their Fault
In the time leading up to your divorce, you and your ex may have argued
and fought over many aspects of your lives together. When you decide to
break the news of your divorce to your children, take the time to reassure
them that the divorce is not their fault in any way. If you and your Ex
had previously fought about issues relating to your children in front
of them, they may feel the fighting occurred because of them. Reassurance
and reminding them you love them are simple things, but can be extremely
effective helping your child cope.
Your child will likely want to know “why” this is happening.
Make sure you and your Ex have previously discussed this question and
come to a united decision on what you will say in response to your child.
Once you have decided on how you will answer your child, it is best to
keep your answer as simple as possible. Provide your child with an honest
answer without being critical about your spouse, just because you and
your spouse cannot get along does not mean you should speak disrespectfully
of them to your children. Simple answers like, “Mommy and Daddy
just don’t get along anymore” will suffice.
If Possible, Try to Keep the Same Routine
When your children are faced with change, you should seriously consider
leaving some of their routines the same. Many children will ask if they
will have to change houses or leave their school, it is important that
you have concrete answers for them when you have this talk. If possible,
try to leave your children with as much routine as possible. If one parent
can move out of the house so the children can remain in their bedrooms
we recommend this option. Also, keeping your child enrolled in the same
school could also help them cope; their friends and familiarity with the
school can provide a support system for them.
Address Any Changes to Their Lives
If your child or children will be facing significant change due to the
divorce, we recommend you address these changes head on. If your children
will live part time with you and part time with your ex, explain they
will now have two houses and two rooms. If they will be attending a new
school, make sure you let them know in an appropriate time.
Contact a Pasadena Divorce Lawyer
If you are thinking of filing for divorce, you should contact our experienced
Pasadena family attorney. Our firm is deeply invested in providing client-centric
legal representation—meaning we are here for you when you need us
the most. Contact our firm to schedule a free initial consultation.